Day #7: #12 Treat yourself

12. Treat yourself

Today was a lazy day, as most Sundays are for our family. Sometimes we have a special event going on, and on holiday weekends we sometimes have to drive to Baker so Michael can go back to Vegas or we spend the entire day together as a family because he has to go back the next day. For the most part, Sundays are happily lazy, filled with movies, cleaning, and work (for me). Most of our movies are toddler-centric, since my two youngest kids are only four and three years old. Today I wanted to do something different.

Awhile back, I bought Teen Beach Movie on DVD. You know, I could lie to you and tell you it was for the kids but I feel like we know each other, so I can’t lie. The movie was for me :-) By some crazy circumstance, my/our DVD was ruined. I’ve been pretty upset since then! I already lost the CD (it’s still in our car’s CD player, in our car, three hours from home). Anyway, my husband felt bad about that, since I really do love the movie. So he tried to surprise me Saturday morning by claiming he was running to the market when in reality he was going to Target to buy me another copy. Alas, they were sold out! Kudos to him for trying to do something beyond sweet, and actually he ended up doing something much sweeter! Instead of that DVD, he came home with “Now You See Me”, a movie I saw three times in theatres, including once with him. We get date nights about once every three months, and that movie was one we actually got to see together *gasp* We wanted to watch it last night, but I didn’t home from the game until well past midnight so that didn’t happen.

I talked to my mom, who agreed to watch the kids for a few hours this afternoon so Ryan and I could watch the movie! We settled in with our snacks and sodas, and we actually got to watch a movie for once! We had a great time discussing the movie, debating parts of it, and just hanging out. So by treating myself to a movie day with my husband, I also got to treat him. A win-win!

When was the last time you treated yourself? What’s your favorite way to treat yourself or others? Post it in the comments!

Day #6: #288 Thank someone for something you usually take for granted

288. Thank someone for something you usually take for granted.

I’m a big USC fan. Actually most of the people in my life, including family and friends, are USC fans, specifically football. My mom has had season tickets for football for a few years now. However, she can’t usually go to the night games, for a variety of reasons. So the games she can’t go to, I take my best friend Dash.

He is awesome. We’ve been best friends for eight years now, and he’s been there for me through some of my darkest times. And he’s an uber SC fan like I am, which is even better! Since our family’s car accident, I’ve luckily been able to hang out with him a few times, because he comes to pick me up. We went to Harvest Crusade, he did both Baker drives for Ryan and refused to let me drive because of my back, etc. He is awesome. He offered to pick me up and drive to the game, because otherwise we wouldn’t have a way to get there. While I was waiting for him to pick me up, I realized I’ve come to expect him to pick me up. Granted, I used to pick him up pretty much every time we hung out so I have come to expect that he’ll do the same now that the situation is reversed. But that doesn’t make it ok.

So when he picked me up, I did the same thing to him that I did to my mom the night before. I smiled and told him “Thank you, tons, for everything. The rides, the help, being my best friend, all of it. I don’t often remember to say thank you, so thank you. Very much.” He leaned over and hugged me.

We often take the little everyday things for granted. And sometimes the not so everyday or little things. Take a moment to tell someone thank you. You’ll both feel better about it.

What have you taken for granted lately? Who have you thanked lately? Post it in the comments!

Day #5: #262 Tell your mom one thing she's always done right

262. Tell your mom one thing she's always done right.

My mom is my bestest friend in the whole entire universe. My bestest friends growing up were her and my Aunt Liz. It was me and Mom together, just the two of us, one strong woman and her daughter that she taught to be strong. My mom is everything to me, and she will always be the most important thing in my life, level with my kidlets and husband.

Today was a difficult day, as I was once again stuck in bed for 90% of the day due to my disability (bad fracture in my back, 11 herniated and ruptured discs in my back from my neck all the way down, degenerative disc disease, and osteogenesis imperfecta/brittle bone disease). I usually have 1-2 quasi bad days per week, and sometimes I start off dang near paralyzed in bed, but I’m able to get up, move, get out and do what I need to do, when my mom encourages me. It always changes. I never know if I’ll wake up and be stuck in bed, or I’ll be able to jump out and go! But even on my absolute worst painful days ever, my mom is always there the second I wake up with ice packs, medicine, even breakfast for me sometimes, and plenty of encouraging words.

Today (Friday) I knew I had to somehow get to Bixby Knolls for the First Fridays event. One of my clients (BeachCrafters) has a fantastic store there, and I promised to do everything in my power to get there to photograph the event (PS her store is a treasure trove of amazingly beautiful and unique handmade items, so check out her website!). I started off the day in horrendous pain, to the point that we were making a contingency plan in case I had to go to the ER. However by mid afternoon, I started feeling better. So I decided to go to the event, and my mom asked if she could accompany me. Time for dinner with my mom, and checking out all of fun stuff with her? No brainer! We took the bus, got to Subway, and as we were sitting there chatting and discussing the plan for the night, I couldn’t help but smile hugely at her. I couldn’t stop smiling, and I said “Thank you, Mom. Thank you a million times.” She smiled back and said “For what?” And I started rattling off tons of reasons why. She’s always been there for me, a million percent. Through my good times, through my awful, through my triumphs and trials, she has been there every single step of the way to encourage and love me.

My mom has always been my biggest supporter. And tonight I reminded her of how much all of that meant to me. Bottom line, she is amazing. Every moment that she has been in my life, it’s been an amazing day.

When was the last time you thanked your parent(s)? What was their reaction? Post it in the comments!

Day #4: #14 Give Yourself A Pep Talk

14. Give yourself a pep talk

I run something amazing called the Lakewood Neighborhood Book Swap. Something that benefits our community, something that people love. As much as I love it, it’s also a thankless job, or rather situation. Just a few days ago, a random guy in a light blue boxy older type car stopped in front of my house and literally stole our sign, one that was written with pride and care on an expensive artist canvas. To say the least, that was hurtful and disheartening.

However today (Thursday) someone dropped off another anonymous donation! I walked outside, and there were two more bags of kid’s books! This after someone left five boxes and a bag of books just last week. I still have no idea who dropped the latest batch of books off. But it was so encouraging and welcome. It reminded me that I am in fact doing something right! I reminded myself that there are some people in life who will knock you down. And then there are people who truly believe in you, and what you’re doing. Reminding myself of that really does inspire and encourage me. We all need some encouragement every once in awhile.

When was the last time you gave yourself a pep talk? Why did you need it? What was the situation? Post it in the comments!

Day #3: #154 Set the road rage aside, and let someone else merge

154. Set the road rage aside, and let someone else merge.

This morning I was on my way to drop off our rental car. Unfortunately we were in a serious car accident a little over a month ago and our car was wrecked. We were on a road trip of sorts, to drop my son off in Baker (he lives in Vegas with his dad and stepmom, and he’s home for holidays). Therefore we haven’t had a car in quite a while, and we now have to rent a car every time he’s home. Hopefully this will all change soon!

So anyway I was in a big rush to get the car back on time, otherwise you do get charged for an additional day. I was coming up to a busy intersection and stressed. At this intersection, there’s a gas station, and I know from much experience that trying to get out of that parking lot and onto the same street I was on is dang near impossible most of the time!

There was a mom driving her minivan, and I could see her two kids in the backseat. She was clearly getting frustrated, obviously she’d be sitting through a few lights trying to escape from that parking lot. So instead of pulling my car all the way forward and waiting at the red light, as most people, me included, usually do, I stopped my car back a ways and waved at her to go in front of me. The look on her face was priceless. She was so relieved! And as they pulled out, the kids waved at me too! I’m hoping that my tiny act of kindness was enough to brighten their day! Usually all it takes is a few seconds of kindness, and that can change someone’s day completely!

What tiny act of kindness have you done for someone lately? Post it in the comments!

Day 2: #96 Respond with compassion

96. When someone does or says something rude or offensive, assume she is having a bad day & respond with compassion

I knew this would be an interesting one, as this is involves a difficult situation for anyone to go through. I also thought it would be at least a few weeks before I encountered something like this. Boy was I wrong.

The day started off nicely enough. After doing some work for my business, Mom and I decided to take the kids to the play area at our mall. The kids were having fun, when all of a sudden a little boy tried to push my son off of one of the play structures and then pulled his hair. A few more instances like that followed, including one where the boy purposely smacked my broken finger. This all culminated into a potentially bad situation. I had left the play area for a few minutes. When I came back, the other mother approached me and accused my mom of slapping the boy in the face. The other moms next to us came straight to her defense, telling the other mom that my mom had simply picked up the boy and set him on the ground from the play structure after that boy had purposely stepped on my son. The situation could've escalated quickly. The other mother called her son over, who admitted that he lied when he told his mom that my mom had slapped him. She sat him down for a timeout.

She was berating him and explaining how lying is always bad, it is never ok to lie. Mom and I exchanged a look. We could both see the frustration clearly written on her face. This was not a one day occurrence. This was obviously something that goes on probably daily. I turned to her and said, "My kids can definitely be handfuls and challenging." She gave us a sad smile and started talking to us about the struggles she was having. The more she talked and we responded, the more she delved deeper into the ongoing struggles. And the less stressed she looked. We sat and talked with her for a half hour before realizing we did need to go. As we left, we reminded her that it does get better, just hang in there, she's strong, she's a mom. She smiled gratefully and looked so much more relaxed. As we started to leave the play area, the other boy ran up and gave us each a hug.

When faced with a difficult or tense situation, it's a natural human reaction to bristle and defend ourselves and our family. The more the other person defends themselves, the more we feel we need to be on both the offensive and defensive, and the more tense everything gets. It's never a win-win situation, but it really is human nature. But in this situation, I happened to remember this one deed, and I responded with compassion instead of going on the offensive. I appreciate what the other mothers did in defending my mom, but that's a perfect example of how most people handle that type of situation. It made all the difference. You will always face difficult people in your life. How you handle that situation and that person often shows who you are as well.

As Ellen Degeneres says, a person I admire immensely, “be kind to one another”.

Have you ever handled a situation with compassion or kindness instead of offense? What happened? Post in the comments!

DAY 1: Commit #362

#362 Commit

Today is Day 1 of my yearlong project, A Journey of 365 Good Deeds. While typing out my list 365 "Good Deed" ideas from my journal, this one definitely stood out to me and I knew this had to be the first entry of my project.

This is definitely going to be quite an undertaking. This project is not for the weak or mild, that's for sure. Yes I'm disabled, yes I'm busy, yes I have a million other things going on, but this journey means so much to me. (Psst, if you check out the "About" page, you'll see what inspired me to take this journey.)

365 days, 365 good deeds, 365 chances to touch someone, inspire them, maybe even change their life. This is a huge project that will be amazing every step of the way.

So really I have no choice but to fully commit to this project!

I'm giving my whole heart to this project, because I know that if I can do it, if I can commit and make it through all 365 days, then my life will change for the better. I'm at a crossroads in my life, and things are not going as well as I would like. So in order to bring back positivity and love into my life, I'm going to give it away to others.

365 days. Holy cow! Wish me luck!

What is something you have committed to do lately? Any words of encouragement for me? Post it in the comments, and feel free to follow my blog by email or on NetworkedBlogs.

Donations! I Need Your Help For Some Of These Deeds!

I am so incredibly excited to do this project, but there is one minor problem. Quite a few of these do require money (see below for the full list of items that need money). Unfortunately my family's financial situation is grim, to say the least. For the first time in over 18 years, I've been unemployed for more than a month. It is frustrating and quite frightening. However, I truly believe that when you put good vibes out into the world, it does come back to you, somehow someway. Which is why I have decided to complete this project, no matter what.

But I do need help from my friends, family, and fans. Some of these deeds don't require much money, some of them do require a larger amount. If you can help donate any amount to this project, that would be greatly appreciated! You can donate via Paypal or contacting me to drop off money, etc. You can email me at ajourneyofgooddeeds@gmail.com Whatever you can contribute, it would be so beyond greatly appreciated! Thank you in advance for your help!

This is the list of deeds that require money:

Add money to an expired meter * Leave your change in the vending machine for the next person * Pay for someone behind you at the lunch counter * Deliver something small & sweet to everyone on your team - midafternoon, just when everyone's energy wanes * Invite a friend to dinner, but bring it to him at his house. Then clean up * Buy a bunch of flowers on your way to work. Give each one to a colleague you appreciate * Drop a meal off at a sick friend's house * Take a sibling out to a movie * Pick up the tab * Buy a coffee for the person behind you in line * Take your dad out for lunch * Print & frame a good picture you've taken of someone & give it to him * Send your mom flowers for no reason * Donate to a charity that benefits animals or children * Buy a nice water bottle, so you'll be less inclined to buy plastic bottles * Leave some homemade cookies at your neighbor's door * Give a homeless person a clean blanket * Bake with your kids * Pack a spontaneous picnic & go outside with your family * Invite your neighbor to dinner * Leave a big tip * Bring your coworker a coffee * Take your partner out to lunch on a workday * Mail homemade cookies to a friend * Plant a seed * Donate a little bit of money to aid disaster relief work somewhere in the world * Leave a favorite book on a bus or train seat for the next passenger to enjoy * Cook dinner for your roommate, neighbor, or friend * Instead of ignoring someone's pain bc you don't know what to say, send a small gift card * Take a yoga class * Make time to visit an art museum * Give an anonymous donation to a person or family in need * Send a card to a coach or boss to whom you are grateful * Invite an acquaintance out for coffee * Send a card and seeds to a neighbor whose garden you admire * Make a really fancy and complicated dessert, and deliver it to a friend as a surprise * Hide some money in the pocket of a coat that's for sale * Pay for a stranger's meal at a restaurant * Buy a plant for your desk * Buy a present for a friend's beloved pet * Create a scrapbook of memories for your family or friends * Make a donation to a friend's favorite charity in her name * Hang a bird feeder to support the local avian population * Sneak over to a friend's house and plant bulbs to surprise her next spring * Leave flowers for a stranger * Buy someone an ice cream cone * Carry a bunch of balloons. Watch heads turn * Make art * Give money to a street performer * Pay for the car behind you at the toll booth * Buy organic * Change your lightbulbs to compact fluorescent lightbulbs (CFLs) * If you're thinking about donating money, ask a friend to contribute and increase the impact * Make signs for the trash, recycling, and compost so it's clear what goes where * Buy two books - one for you and one for a friend * Frame a family photo, and hang it on your wall * Buy a box of thank-you notes and birthday cards so you're always ready to mark an occasion * Take your grandmother out for a fancy cocktail * Pack extra lunch for a coworker * Plan a party. Invite someone new * Experiment with a vegan or vegetarian meal * Make a special meal for someone you love * Leave a treat on your coworker's desk * Buy double the canned goods and donate the extras to a food bank * Go to a friend's gallery opening, sports game, poetry reading, play... finally * Make a special treat for a friend with food allergies * Draw a portrait of a friend (all the better if you have no drawing skills) * Tip your barista * Add a few plants to your bedroom * Start a composting program at your building, school, or home * Leave an umbrella in a public place for someone to use * Read a classic * Buy lunch for a homeless person * Invite a friend to a show and buy her a ticket * Put a little cash in your savings account * Go out for coffee with a coworker you don't know well * Leave a bunch of extra change near the jukebox, at the laundromat, or by the vending machine * Knit or sew a gift for a new baby * Buy handmade * Plant flowers where someone will enjoy them * Leave flowers on the statue of someone you admire * Plan a birthday party for a friend. Make it memorable.

WELCOME!

Welcome to A Journey of 365 Good Deeds! This blog chronicles the journey and mission of one woman to do 365 good deeds over 365 days. The inspiration comes from the journal "One Good Deed A Day: A Journal".

Who is Heather? The short version is, I'm a mom, wife, Social Media Consultant, published author, avid volunteer, charity crafter, and heARTist. You can visit my website at http://www.heathernelson.info and my blog at http://www.myworkofheart.net

Why do this project? Why not! The world is a cold harsh place often times. I fancy myself an optimist and avid volunteer, someone who wants to change the world and make it a better place, one good deed at a time. If someone, one person, anyone is inspired to do something nice for others, then I'll consider this project a success!